Posted in A moms opinion, Jude, Timothy

Toddler sleep problems……

Today my husband found me getting video’s edited and ready to post onto youtube and wanted to know what I was up to. So I told him that I was blogging – his immediate reaction made me giggle and I’ll tell you why shortly. You see, we have had so many different things going on in our lives that there is a lot to talk about and so I assumed he would know that I’m just documenting what’s happened recently in our lives in general. So he’s never really given any input to what I write about or made any suggestions, but today he said this……..

“Yes! please (loud sigh) please, please, blog about Jude and what’s been happening with his sleep lately……..” Now, to any parent who has a toddler or active 4 year old, this just sounds like the normal day – right? yes, that’s right. You see, with our other two children, Tim wasn’t really around for their sleep training in the evenings. Now, as I always say – I’m not complaining, we did and do life and as the punches roll – we take them and make them work.

But, you see with my other two, I was extremely strict with the bedtime routine so that my sanity could be saved and so that I could be an adult for at least 3 hours before I had to sleep and start all over again the next day. #homeschoolingmamma

Well, you see – with our little prince things have been very different. There have been many contributing factors as to why we haven’t been as strict with him. Let me list them shall we……..

  1. I am no longer a lone parent doing bedtime routine. Tim works from home and so from the very beginning of Jude’s life, has been able to take shifts. Made me slacken my bootstraps………hmmmmm.
  2. Leaving him to cry it out wasn’t an option because it would just break my mother in law’s heart and she would most probably see to Jude’s tender hearted crying needs (this would have been when he was a lot smaller, when sleep training had a cot involved and a toddler that couldn’t run around)
  3. Our routine has us running a committed schedule up until 8:30pm most nights – where I can’t be home to routinely put the prince to bed…… so Tim takes care of it while I see to the princesses.

Ok, with these basic factors – a few things ran a-muck last year when we realised that the late bedtime actually stressed Jude out. So I trained him for a bit and it worked………. but handing the routine over to my lovely husband didn’t work out as well as I’d hoped. Shame, the poor man thought that it would be ok to let him go to sleep just a ‘little’ later and it would be ok……… well – not so much.

But, I left it and have thought it was working because that’s just how it has to be – due to the way our commitments have been running. Whatya gotta do? right?

So over the last few months, my precious husband will come in and flop on the bed, sigh and will say the same thing, “we have to do something about his bedtime routine, it’s just not working” – this is when I will politely reply, “yes, my love – I know – but if you follow the time stamps I’ve laid out before, it will work. It’s a little bit of sacrifice for that hour – but he will fall asleep a lot quicker”

This conversation has happened a few times, and I must be honest – as much as it pains me to be right – it works. (who am I kidding, it’s nice to be right – but I don’t like that I can’t help him – that’s the part that pains me) I read Baby Sense a few times and I maintain that the truth about overstimulation, and not catching the window – leaves any child over the edge and a nightmare to get to bed – let alone stay asleep. But, we live and learn and have to walk through as we best can.

So, as a result our poor boy has been struggling to go to bed and lying awake for almost two hours and then waking up multiple times during the night. It hasn’t been fun and it’s not sustainable.

So, I’m doing as my husband has requested and, I’m blogging about the fact that our son is struggling to sleep well and we are at our wits end about what to do. But, I say that in the hopes that Jude sleeps through tonight – why? I hear you ask – well, my beloved husband did the routine this evening and it worked! he was fast asleep before we walked through the bedroom doors again at the girls bedtime and now we wait with baited breath as we lay our heads down to sleep. Here’s hoping that he sleeps through and doesn’t wake up during the night – we shall see.

If you have any tips on helping your toddler sleep well at night – please let me know what you’ve done or are doing. As a note – he doesn’t do day sleeps and hasn’t since he was two and half. If he doesn’t he ends up staying awake until 11 and that’s just not happening.

The goal is to get him sleeping from 7:30pm – 7:00am. If we can get more in – great!

 

Author:

I'm a woman finding my way through life as the wife of Tim, the mom to 3 growing kids and trying to maintain some sort of self through it all. I hope you enjoy reading how I’m trying to find myself through this life.

4 thoughts on “Toddler sleep problems……

  1. Shavs- I am brutal with this in my world- with 4 littles….. home schooling too and needing some sanity!
    I have a zero tolerance policy- especially with my 4 year old. Bedtime is bedtime- do not come out unless it’s fire, vomit or blood! So- it’s a smack if you get out- that’s it! It works from this age for sure 😳pretty sure I will be lynched for posting this online 😂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lol! I love the way say you’ll be lynched. We’re all for a “go to sleep” wooden spoon application – but it’s been a little harder with the older ones only coming home at 8:30. The strict routine has worked – it’s just consistency that’s harder to deal with……. mine are allowed to come out if they haven’t pee’d. I can’t deal with wet beds 🤣

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  2. The problem we are having is the early waking up part. Amari has no issues with bedtime. He also has at least a 2 hour nap during the day at school. For some reason lately, he wakes up between 04:00 and 05:00….WIDE AWAKE!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Now, that story I can identify with-Iraina was like that up until she could tell time, then we trained her to stay in bed until 5:30, then 6:00, we have slowly progressed it to 6:30.
      Have you tried cutting his day nap shorter? It’s a compromise of having a grumpy kid or an early wake up? Sometimes worked for us. It’s choosing the lesser of two hard outcomes 🤷🏽‍♀️ it sucks but they do grow up 🥴🥴

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